Tag Archives: Goal Setting

Are Your Goals Your Drug of Choice?

No life is perfect, and facing that reality causes pain. It’s our natural tendency to run away from pain. We all have our drugs of choice to avoid pain.

Some of us use recreational drugs. Others use alcohol, cigarettes, or caffeine. The new generation prefer their gadgets.

A Socially Endorsed Drug

There is another drug that is not only socially acceptable but also encouraged, especially by the personal development industry.

That drug is having big hairy audacious goals. I’m not against setting goals. On the contrary, I encourage you to set goals and work toward them.

I subscribe to the idea that happiness comes from working toward a worthy goal. There is a pitfall when setting a goal though. Your goal might be a distraction to avoid facing your reality.

Audit Your Approach to Goals

There’s a simple test you can take to figure out whether your big hairy audacious goal is a vision or a distraction.

Just answer these simple questions.

  • Which actions did you take yesterday, last week, or last month toward your goal?
  • Which progress did you make yesterday, last week, or last month toward your goal?
  • What is your plan and your milestones from now until the accomplishment of your goal?

If you can answer these three questions with specific, realistic answers, you have a vision. If you can’t answer them or your answers are vague, then you have an illusion.

Evaluate Your Answers

Write down your goal and answers on a piece of paper. Stand up and walk around a little. Come back and pick up that piece of paper. Imagine the goal and the answers on that piece of paper belong to another person.

  • What would you think about that person?
  • Is that person realistic?
  • Do they have a good chance of realizing their goal?
  • Or are they fooling themselves?

Correct Your Course If Necessary

If you took this test and you figured out that your goal is more of a distraction than a vision, don’t worry. You can always correct your course or adjust your goal.

If you need some course correction, the posts mentioned in this thread might be a good starting point for you.

Then What?

Let’s do another exercise on your goal. Suppose that you have accomplished your goal. Then what?

  • What’s going to change in your life?
  • How will your days, weeks, and years look like?
  • How will you feel?

Keep asking the same “then what” question until you run out of answers. The “then what” exercise is similar to the “five whys” exercise. In the “five whys” exercise, we go back in time. In the “then what” exercise, we go further in time.

The Unmet Basic Needs Behind Your Goals

If you do this exercise, you’ll end up with some basic needs. Here’s an example.

  • I want to make ten million dollars.
  • Then what?
  • I’m going to retire.
  • Then what?
  • I’m going to have enough time to rest.
  • Then what?
  • I’m going to feel good.

The basic need you’re aiming for is feeling good. If this sounds familiar, I have two questions for you.

  • What keeps you from feeling good now?
  • What makes you think that you’ll feel good when you have ten million dollars in the bank?

Take Responsibility Now

Most of the time, we avoid taking the responsibility to take care of our basic needs. We postpone them to the future. We associate them with some big hairy audacious goals so that we don’t have to deal with them now.

If you want ten million dollars in the bank, because your basic need is security, I have bad news for you.

When you don’t feel secure now, you won’t feel secure with ten million dollars in the bank. You’ll always find something to be anxious about.

Your feelings determine your perception, not the other way around.

A person with a million dollar net worth might think that they’re rich, where else another one with ten million dollar net worth considers themselves middle class.

Fear of Success

We’re all aware of the fear of failure. Deep down, you might also be afraid of success. The best way to find that out is to do the “then what” exercise above.

  • Suppose that you want financial freedom.
  • Then what?
  • You’ll have a lot of time and money on your hands.
  • What are you going to do with that extra time and money?

Think about what you do with your extra time and money now. How does it feel to do that on a 10x scale?

If you don’t do anything interesting with your extra time and money now, how will you motivate yourself to work toward that 10x extra time and money?

If you indulge in drinking, partying, and drugs in your spare time, you might be afraid to do that on a 10x scale.

If you waste your spare time with distractions, you might not want to have that extra time and money, because your current job is more meaningful than that.

What If I Lose It All?

You might be afraid of success because you might be afraid that you’ll get used to the lifestyle, and it would feel much worse if you lost it all.

To clarify your mind about what success means for you, do the “then what” exercise. Write it out in detail. Write down your life story from the accomplishment of your goal until your death.

In other words, write your obituary.

  • How do you feel about your story?
  • Is it a congruent story?
  • Do some parts contradict each other?

Contradicting Desires

It’s natural that we have desires that contradict each other. That doesn’t mean that we have to let go all of them. You can do the obituary exercise for each desire.

Suppose that you can live as many lives as you want. Your task is to optimize each life for one of your desires. If you had multiple lives, how would you live each of them?

Don’t underestimate this exercise. It helps you set aside your limiting beliefs. As a result, you can come up with some exciting ideas to realize your goals.

When you complete the exercise for multiple desires, merge them into a single life story by making some conscious choices to let go some of your conflicting desires.

Conclusion

Happiness comes from working toward a worthy goal. Yet, you might use your goals to distract yourself from facing your reality.

To see if that’s the case, audit your approach to goals using the exercise explained in this post. If your answers don’t satisfy you, you can either upgrade your approach or modify your goals.

Sometimes, we postpone our basic needs by associating them with our goals. You figure out which basic needs you avoid by doing the “then what” exercise.

We think that our life situation creates our emotions. In reality, it is the other way around. Therefore, we need to take the responsibility of our emotions first.

Even though it sounds absurd, we might also be afraid of success. That could happen if our vision doesn’t inspire at all. We might be afraid of the realization of our vision, or succeeding and then losing it all.

In either case, the first step is to come up with a compelling, congruent story about our future.

Four Exercises to Internalize New Beliefs that Serve Your Goals

Yesterday’s post was about evaluating whether our beliefs were aligned with our goals. This evaluation consists of five steps.

  1. Find the beliefs that contradict your goals.
  2. Question the beliefs that contradict your goals.
  3. Make a list of alternative beliefs that serve your goals.
  4. Handle your objections against the new beliefs.
  5. Add your existing beliefs that support your goals to the list.

The idea is to write down those beliefs and repeat them to yourself frequently until you internalize them at the gut level.

If you haven’t read yesterday’s post, I recommend you read that post and do that exercise first.

More Tips to Internalize New Beliefs

In today’s post, I’m going to share some tips to internalize your new beliefs.

Before we continue, pick a new belief that you want to internalize. That way, you’ll be able to do the exercises as I introduce them.

I’ll work on the new belief “I can develop new social skills.”

Look for Evidence

Look at the world or your own life for evidence of the new belief. We want to collect as much evidence as possible to convince ourselves that our new belief is true.

To find evidence, I’ll ask two questions.

  • Have I ever developed a new social skill?
  • Are there other people who developed new social skills?

Feel free to ask more questions to find evidence for your new belief.

Have I ever developed a new social skill?

Yes, I have. I learned public speaking in college. I developed this skill further in Toastmasters, a nonprofit that helps its member to improve their public speaking skills.

Are there other people who developed new social skills?

Yes, there are. Some people even started to teach social skills to others. Leil Lowndes explains how she developed her social skills in her book How to Talk to Anyone. She has many books on the topic, including Goodbye to Shy.

Create Evidence

The proof is in the pudding. Take your new belief and create evidence of it, no matter how small.

In our example, I’ll come up with a few questions to ask my colleagues next Monday morning. I’ll ask them how their weekend was and how their families are doing. I’ll listen carefully and ask a few follow-up questions.

That’s a small example, but it’s a case that shows that I can learn new social skills and apply them in my life.

Visualization

Take the time to visualize yourself in a situation that validates your new belief.

Don’t imagine yourself in a position that is entirely outside of your comfort zone. Visualize an event that is slightly outside of your comfort zone. A situation that creates slight discomfort, but no panic.

If you have social anxiety, visualizing yourself talking to thousands of people won’t help you. Visualizing yourself making a presentation to your colleagues at work will help.

Some objections might come up during your visualization. Write them down and apply the objection handling exercise of yesterday.

  • Is this objection accurate?
  • Can I come up with another belief that would serve my goal more?
  • If yes, what is it?

In my case, I’m afraid that I’ll be nervous during my presentation to my colleagues.

  • Accurate? Yes.
  • Another belief possible? Yes.
  • Alternative? Nervousness is a natural part of giving presentations. Everybody experiences it. Otherwise, the speaker would put the audience to sleep.

Act It Out

Go after new opportunities to create more evidence of your new belief.

  • Write down your ideal self or situation.
  • Write down your current self or situation.
  • Write down a situation that is one step further than your current situation toward the ideal.

Don’t underestimate these 1% improvements. If you make a 1% improvement every day, you’ll make a 3800% improvement in a given year.

  • Make a list of 1% improvements in your situation.
  • Every day, pick one of them and do it.

This might feel awkward in the beginning, but after a few weeks, you’ll build momentum. It’ll be a part of your daily routine. It’ll come naturally to you. You’ll miss it if you don’t do it.

Conclusion

To succeed at a goal, we need to align our beliefs with that goal. We need to audit our beliefs and detect the ones that don’t serve our goals.

The second step is to question those contradicting beliefs and replace them with beliefs that do serve our goals.

Beliefs are deep-seated thoughts that we believed to be true for a long time. Therefore, objections might rise from the depths of our psyche. We can apply the same questioning technique to those objections.

There are some actions that we can take to internalize our new beliefs.

  • Repeat our new beliefs often to ourselves.
  • Find evidence of our new beliefs.
  • Create evidence of our new beliefs no matter how small.
  • Visualize ourselves in situations that validate our new beliefs.
  • Act our new beliefs out in the world.

When doing these go out of your comfort zone one step at a time. We can accomplish amazing feats just by taking one step at a time every day.

Do This Exercise before Setting a Goal

When you set a goal, ask yourself whether it contradicts with one of your beliefs. Reflect on that question and write down everything that comes up.

Example: Beliefs against Setting Up a Business

Suppose that you plan to set up a business. Which one of your beliefs contradict that goal?

  • Setting up a business requires a lot of hard work.
  • I’m lazy.
  • It requires a lot of connections.
  • I don’t have any connections.
  • It requires social skills.
  • I don’t have any social skills.
  • It involves a lot of risks.
  • I don’t want to go bankrupt.

The list goes on, but let’s work with this list.

Question Your Beliefs

We’re going to ask three questions for each belief.

  • Is this belief accurate?
  • Can I come up with another belief that would serve my goal more?
  • If yes, what is it?

Let’s go over our list.

Setting up a business requires a lot of hard work.

  • Accurate? Yes.
  • Another belief possible? No.

I’m lazy.

  • Accurate? To some extent.
  • Another belief possible? Yes.
  • Alternative? I can cultivate the self-discipline to work hard.

Setting up a business requires a lot of connections.

  • Accurate? To some extent.
  • Another belief possible? Yes.
  • Alternative? Setting up a business requires some connections.

I don’t have any connections.

  • Accurate? To some extent.
  • Another belief possible? Yes.
  • Alternative? I can build the connections that are necessary to set up a business.

Setting up a business requires social skills.

  • Accurate? To some extent.
  • Another belief possible? Yes.
  • Alternative? Setting up a business requires some social skills.

I don’t have any social skills.

  • Accurate? To some extent.
  • Another belief possible? Yes.
  • Alternative? I can cultivate the social skills that are required to build a business.

Setting up a business involves a lot of risks.

  • Accurate? To some extent.
  • Another belief possible? Yes.
  • Alternative? Setting up a business involves some risks.

I don’t want to go bankrupt.

  • Accurate? Yes.
  • Another belief possible? Yes.
  • Alternative? I’ll manage my risks to minimize the probability of bankruptcy.

Write Down Your New Beliefs

  • Setting up a business requires a lot of hard work.
  • I can cultivate the self-discipline to work hard.
  • Setting up a business requires some connections.
  • I can build the connections that are necessary to set up a business.
  • Setting up a business requires some social skills.
  • I can cultivate the social skills that are required to build a business.
  • Setting up a business involves some risks.
  • I’ll manage my risks to minimize the probability of bankruptcy.

Can You Change Your Beliefs?

Your beliefs are some thoughts that you accepted to be true at a particular moment in your life. Throughout the time, you reinforced those thoughts in your psyche, and they turned into deep-seated beliefs.

You can change your beliefs by taking the following steps.

  • Read your new set of beliefs frequently.
  • Memorize them.
  • Repeat them often.
  • Recognize your objections to your new beliefs.
  • Work on those objections, and add new beliefs to your list if necessary.

Objection Handling

Suppose that you repeat the new belief about developing social skills. You detect some objections coming up.

  • I’m an introvert.
  • Introvert people have poor social skills.
  • You either have social skills, or you don’t. You can’t develop them.

Now, apply the same questions to your objections.

I’m an introvert.

  • Accurate? Yes.
  • Another belief possible? No.

Introvert people have poor social skills.

  • Accurate? Not necessarily.
  • Another belief possible? Yes.
  • Alternative? An introvert can have excellent social skills.

You either have social skills, or you don’t. You can’t develop them.

  • Accurate? Not necessarily.
  • Another belief possible? Yes.
  • Alternative? I can develop social skills if I invest the time and effort necessary.

Beware of the Fixed Mindset

I included the last objection on purpose to introduce the concept of fixed mindset and growth mindset.

People with a fixed mindset believe that a person can’t develop new skills or improve themselves. The opposite of the fixed mindset is the growth mindset.

The idea of the growth mindset is the fundamental principle of personal development.

When I first heard about the growth mindset in the book Mindset by Carol Dweck, my outlook on life changed.

Core Beliefs Have a Great Impact on Your Life.

Our mindset is a core belief. Our core beliefs determine the rest of our beliefs, which in turn affect our thoughts and actions.

If you have a fixed mindset, I strongly recommend that you read the book Mindset by Carol Dweck, and replace it with the growth mindset.

Add Your Existing, Supportive Beliefs

Next to your new set of beliefs, write down your existing beliefs that support your goal.

  • Compared to a job, setting up a business results in greater wealth in the long run.
  • By setting up a business, I’ll produce significantly more value.
  • I’ll create new job opportunities for people who need them.
  • I’ll become the best version of myself.
  • I’ll make the most of my life.
  • I’ll be able to enjoy my life more.

Merge the three lists into a single list. Print it out. Read it often. Memorize it. And repeat it. Keep handling the objections as they come up. Add new beliefs to your list as needed.

Conclusion

Your actions play a critical role in creating your reality. Your actions are the results of your programming. Your programming is the result of your beliefs. Your beliefs stem from your core beliefs.

You can change your life and your results by changing your beliefs. You can do that by coming up with a new set of beliefs that are aligned with your goals.

Your existing beliefs are nothing but some thoughts that you believed to be true. You can change your beliefs by repeating your new set of beliefs until you internalize them at the gut level.

Coming Soon…

The exercise in this post is the first step you need to take to align your beliefs with your goals. In a follow up post, I’m going to share other practices to internalize your new set of beliefs.

How to Eliminate the Stress While Working Towards Your Goals

There’s no failure in a scientific experiment. You either achieve your goals or you find out what doesn’t work and gain experience.

Lately, “intelligent people feeling miserable” became a popular blog topic. It’s a bait topic to make miserable people feel better about themselves. “I feel miserable, so I must be intelligent.” And let’s face it; most people feel miserable about themselves, because pessimism is ingrained into our brains.

Pessimism had its evolutionary advantages back in the day. You might be better off feeling pessimistic when you see a lion instead of trying to pet it. The flip side of pessimism is to feel miserable.

Pessimism is not necessarily productive when it comes to working towards your goals. It makes you feel miserable. If you keep feeling miserable, you’ll give up on your goals eventually, unless you have world class self-discipline. There’s a way around pessimism though.

Define Your Goals as Scientific Experiments

The way to eliminate all negative feelings about your goals is to define them as scientific experiments. You can do that by carrying out the following steps.

  1. What is the outcome you want to achieve? Specify the outcome you want to achieve.
  2. What are the conditions of the experiments?
  3. Which actions are you going to take to achieve the outcome?
  4. Formulate the outcome and conditions as a hypothesis you will test.
  5. Carry out the test.
  6. Evaluate and report your results.
  7. Update your experimental design and repeat.

Define the Outcome You Want to Achieve

When you define the outcome you want to achieve, be as specific as possible. This definition must be measurable without any doubt. Imagine you are a scientist. When a group of scientists look at your results, they should be able to assess your results without any doubts and decide unanimously. Instead of stating your goal as “getting rich,” state your goal as “having a net worth of ten million dollars within ten years from now.” The first definition of your goal, “getting rich,” is vague. The second definition of the goal, “a net worth of ten million dollars within ten years from now,” is precise. A panel of economists would agree unanimously whether that goal is reached or not.

Define the Conditions of the Experiment

Under which conditions are you going to execute the experiment? How long will the experiment last? Which actions are you going to take? What is your plan for each day, week, and month? For example, if your goal is to lose weight, what will be your daily meal list? What will the amount of each meal be? How many calories are you going to consume in total each day? What will be your daily and weekly exercise regimen? How long is the experiment going to last? How many pounds do you expect to lose every week?

Keep the Feedback Loop Short

When designing your experiment, keep the feedback loop short. That way you can evaluate your results and update your experimental design faster. If you have a long term goal, you can break it down into smaller parts with the divide and conquer algorithm and the reverse engineering method.

Evaluate Your Results

Once the experiment is over, it’s time to evaluate your results. Did the actions you planned result in the achievement of your goal? If not, why not? Were you able to carry those actions out? If yes, how close were you to the achievement of your goal? You can ask these and other questions to analyze the results of your experiment.

Update Your Experimental Design and Start Again

As you see, there’s no failure in a scientific experiment. You either achieve your goals or you find out what doesn’t work and gain experience. Once you find out what doesn’t work, then you can update your experimental design according to your experience and start a new experiment. Just keep repeating until you succeed. Even success is not a reason to stop your experiments. Once you succeed, you can set another goal and apply the scientific method to that goal.

What are the benefits of applying the scientific method to your goals?

When you apply the scientific method to your goals, you work in a well-defined framework. There’s no room for procrastination, deviation from the initial plans, and arbitrary decision-making. Everything is well-defined and clear. You either follow the experimental plan or not. If you can’t follow the plan, then you need to evaluate at the end of the experimental period, why you could not. If you followed the plan but couldn’t achieve your goal, then it’s time to come up with another plan towards the achievement of your goal.

There is no failure in scientific method. All you have to do is to formulate hypotheses and to verify them with experiments. Either the experiment passes or you find out that the action plan you came up with doesn’t serve the goal you have set. Then it’s time to update your action plan and continue working towards your goal until you succeed. When there’s no failure to working towards your goal, there is no stress, and there is no feeling bad. This type of approach to your goals eliminate all the bad feelings about them. It puts the focus on what you can control instead of what you can’t control. That eliminates the stress as well.

Optimize Each Area of Your Life with Multi-Objective Optimization

In the last two posts, I have discussed how we can apply the concept of algorithms and the divide and conquer method in our lives. Both concepts help us maximizing our effectiveness, by focusing on a single problem and action step at a time. This increases clarity and decreases error-proneness and waste of time.

What is multi-objective optimization?

In today’s post, I’m going to discuss how we can apply another computer science concept, multi-objective optimization, in our lives. Multi-objective optimization involves finding solutions that are optimal for multiple criteria. When the process is complete, a decision maker decides on one of the solutions.

A typical example is to find products that are optimal for price and quality. We find different products that have different price and quality levels. In this context an optimal product has the highest quality on each price level. Then we choose one of the products that is on a price level and has the quality that we are comfortable with.

How can we use multi-objective optimization in our lives?

The first step to use multi-objective optimization in our lives is to determine which areas of our lives we want to optimize. The first step is similar to the divide and conquer algorithm. Instead of trying to solve the big, hard problem of optimizing our lives, we try to solve the smaller, easier problem of optimizing a single area of our lives at a time.

For example, you might want to optimize health and fitness, family, career, saving, investments, and travel. Please make your own list of life areas that make sense to you. Once you have your list, pick one of your life areas. Now, imagine there is nothing else in your life and you want to optimize your life according to that life area. How would you do that? How would your life look like?

“Now, imagine there is nothing else in your life and you want to optimize your life according to that life area.”

For example, if I wanted to optimize my life according to health and fitness, I would do a cardio workout for an hour every day in nature. I would work out in the gym four to five times a week. I would only consume healthy foods. I would never consume anything that isn’t 100% healthy such as alcohol, caffeine, any deserts, and so on. I’d sleep at least for eight hours every day. I’d stay away from stress, and so on.

Thought Experiment

The goal here is not to be realistic. This is more of a thought experiment than creating a realistic action plan. The goal here is to imagine everything else is taken care of in your life, you have no other obligations, and the only thing you have to optimize in your life is the life area that you are working on. This eliminates all the excuses, limiting beliefs, and mental barriers.

“Multi-objective optimization inspires you to recognize what’s possible for you. Once you see what’s possible for you, then you can find a more realistic solution.”

In some cases, it’s beneficial to try to implement a solution that is as close to the ideal solution as possible. That way you will immerse yourself in that solution. Once you experience what is possible for you, then you can gradually decrease the intensity of that solution to reach a solution that is in balance with the rest of your life.

Optional: Focus on a Single Goal for a Month

For example, when I picked up working out again six months ago, I worked out twice a day for six days a week. The first workout was a cardio in nature and the second workout, strength training in the gym. Gradually, I decreased the frequency and intensity of my workouts to bring them in balance with the rest of my life. Nevertheless, that experience showed me what was possible for me in the area of fitness. That helped me find a solution that was a conscious choice and not a solution that was limited by my mental barriers.

“Implementing the ideal solution in my life helped me find a solution that was a conscious choice and not a solution that was limited by my mental barriers.”

An optional part of the multi-objective optimization in your life is that you can dedicate a certain period of your life to a certain area of your life. For example, you can dedicate a month to your health and fitness and live the most optimal version of your life with respect to health and fitness. Or you can dedicate a month to your family, to socializing, to travel, and so on. That way you will know what’s possible for you in that area of your life and make a conscious, balanced choice later. That choice won’t be limited by your limiting beliefs.

Summary

You can optimize your life by focusing on a single area of your life at a time. Make a list of your life areas and pick one. Come up with an optimal solution for that area assuming that the rest of your life will be taken care of. This eliminates all of your excuses, limiting beliefs, and mental barriers. The next step is to find a less optimal solution that is more balanced with the rest of your life. Optionally, you can commit a month or more to the optimal solution to immerse yourself in it. Then you can gradually decrease the intensity to reach a more balanced solution. That way you will experience what’s possible for you in life.

Which area of your life are you going to optimize next? What’s the optimal solution for you in that area?

How to Tackle Overwhelming Challenges Effectively

This principle is so simple that it sounds obvious. However, most of us overlook it in practice and become overwhelmed in the face of challenges.

The algorithm concept from computer science involves breaking down large tasks into action steps. Using algorithms improves your effectiveness by increasing clarity and decreasing error-proneness and waste of time.

The divide and conquer algorithm is one of the most useful computer science concepts that you can use in your daily life. It involves dividing a big problem into smaller problems and then solving those smaller problems one problem at a time. This principle is so simple that it sounds obvious. However, most of us overlook it in practice and become overwhelmed in the face of challenges.

Suppose that you want to optimize your life. That’s a huge challenge. You can divide it into smaller problems and solve one problem at a time. In this case, you can divide your life in different areas and focus on each area separately. You can divide your life into private and professional. You can divide each area further into subareas. For example, you can divide your private life into family, health, and hobbies. You can divide health into diet, exercise, and stress-reduction. The more clear-cut your problems and action steps are, the more effective your solutions will be.

Focus on a Single Problem at a Time

The key point in divide and conquer is that you focus on a single problem at a time. Suppose that you want to optimize your life and you divide your life into several areas. The next step is to pick one of those life areas and focus on it. For example, you might want to focus on your diet for a month until you adopt a healthy diet. Once you adopt a healthy diet, you can work on building a habit of physical exercise for a month. This way of approaching challenges is way more effective than trying to solve all of your challenges at once.

Focusing your time, energy, and attention on a single problem at hand is way more effective than trying to solve all of your problems at once.

Summary

Dividing big challenges in your life into smaller challenges and complex tasks into simple action steps will maximize your effectiveness. You can apply the concept of algorithms in general and the divide and conquer algorithm in particular to your challenges and tasks. The key here is to focus on a single challenge and action step at a time.

Whenever you feel overwhelmed by a challenge, divide it into smaller problems and tackle each problem separately.

Which challenge are you facing right now? How can you divide it into smaller parts? Which part do you choose to solve next?

How to Maximize Your Effectiveness

Using some simple computer science concepts can boost your effectiveness in life. They are very simple to use. You can use them with a pen and paper if you want to.

The notion of algorithm is a fundamental concept of computer science. Algorithms are also extremely useful in our daily lives, private as well as professional. An algorithm is simply dividing a task into several smaller tasks. It has a well-defined set of inputs and output. It gives you clarity about which step to execute at each time. You can think about it as a plan with precise action steps.

A cooking recipe is an algorithm. It has a list of inputs, an output, and action steps. The inputs of a recipe are the ingredients. The output is the dish. The action steps are the steps that you take to cook the dish.

What are the benefits?

Every time you write down the action steps to complete a task, you actually write an algorithm. Writing an algorithm for a task might sound like a waste of time to you if you aren’t familiar with the concept, but it has a lot of benefits.

Writing down an algorithm provides clarity. It eliminates confusion. You exactly know what to do at each step. You don’t need to think or hesitate what to do at each step, which saves a lot of time and energy once you are in execution mode.

Working from an algorithm enables you to focus on a single step without worrying about the rest. It eliminates the need to figure out what to do next after completing each step.

Writing an algorithm takes some time to think through the steps. It prevents you from making decisions in the heat of the moment. Both of which reduce your error-proneness.

Algorithms save time. This is especially true for repetitive tasks. Instead of trying to figure out what to do each time, you simply go true the steps.

An Example from My Own Life

I have an LLC that requires weekly, monthly, quarterly administration. Even though I have this LLC for seven years by now, I don’t know every step I have to take by heart. These administration steps are not my core competency. I prepared a list of action steps, basically an algorithm, to execute every week, month, and quarter. I just go through this list every week, month, and quarter without thinking much about it or trying to learn it by heart. Even if I learned it by heart, I’d worry weather I remembered all the steps correctly or forgot a step. Now, I have complete peace of mind knowing that I do what I have to do, because these steps are outlined clearly in front of me. I use Evernote for this type of note taking. It’s a free tool for most purposes and has sufficient features to satisfy my needs.

As you can see you can write algorithms for a one-time complex tasks, as well as repetitive tasks. I prefer to write down the action steps no matter how simple a task is, unless it’s a single step task. This gives me the opportunity to reflect upon how to do it properly in advance, so that I don’t choose a less efficient way to execute the task.

Level of Details

If you have a very complex task at hand, algorithms are especially useful. You can always choose the level of details in an algorithm. If you have a complex task at hand, divide the task into five to seven action steps. If the action steps are not precise enough, you can always take an action step and write an algorithm for that action step. You can break down an action step into further action steps. You can go into as much detail as you want. At the end, you will have a set of algorithms that consist of further algorithms and each algorithm is simple enough to be understood, maintained, and executed easily. Computer programs are written this way and why should you not apply the same principle to your everyday tasks?

Summary

You can apply the concept of algorithm in your life by breaking down bigger tasks into smaller action steps. Writing an algorithm for a task in advance helps you think through the process in advance. Having an algorithm during the execution gives you mental clarity which action to take next. It eliminates confusion, hesitancy, waste of time, and error-proneness.

If you have done the exercises in the posts about finding your direction and perspective in life, you can apply the concept of algorithms to your answers. If you haven’t done them yet, what are you waiting for? Do you need some motivation?

How to Build World Class Self-Discipline in a Single Year

Don’t start the New Year without reading this post. Create a simple self-discipline improvement plan now. It’s not as hard as you may think.

Self-discipline is the most critical quality to achieve success. For most of us, it’s not a question whether we can or we can’t achieve something. It’s a question of whether we will or we won’t. We humans are extremely capable beings. We can learn whatever we set our minds to. It takes time and effort and that requires self-discipline. If it all comes down to self-discipline, it’s worth thinking about a few questions.

  • How can we cultivate self-discipline?
  • How can we build world class self-discipline in a single year?
  • Is it even possible?
  • If it is possible, will it be a year of agony?

Yes, it is possible to build world-class self-discipline in a single year. No, it doesn’t have to be a year of agony. On the contrary, putting yourself through agony can be counterproductive to your self-discipline.

It’s a Progress

Let me ask you another question. Could you build a great physique if you exercised every day, watched what you eat, and have sufficient rest every day? Of course you could. It’s the same with self-discipline. It’s a muscle just like the ones in your body. The more you take care and exercise it, the stronger it will get.

What do you do to build muscles in your body? You start lifting weights that you can lift with slight discomfort. As you get comfortable lifting a certain set of weights, you increase the weights. By gradually increasing the weights you lift, you increase your lean muscle mass.

“Self-discipline is a muscle just like the ones in your body. You can build world class self-discipline just by improving it 1% every day.”

The trick here is the gradual increase in weights to maintain a slight discomfort when you’re training. It’s not lifting the weights that are completely in your comfort zone. It’s also not trying to lift the weights that are completely outside of your comfort zone. It’s about finding that sweet spot between these two extremes. It’s the same with building your self-discipline.

You don’t want to overextend your self-discipline, so that you burn out and give up completely. You also don’t want to neglect your self-discipline, so that it weakens. You want to increase your use of self-discipline every day by 1%. Can you do that? Of course, you can. What would be the result of 1% increase in self-discipline over a year? 3778% improvement in a year, or in other words, 38 times improvement.

How do you do that?

It’s very simple. Make a list of all the things that require self-discipline in your life. Think about the habits that you want to quit and the habits that you want to adopt. Write them down.

Now, pick one of those habits and break it down to minimum increments. This would work the best with a diary. I prefer a physical diary over a digital one, because a physical exercise makes this exercise tangible and increases accountability. If you want to increase the accountability, you can make an agreement with someone as your accountability partner and report them your daily/weekly progress. If you want to increase the accountability even more, you can make your goal public and post your results on a daily basis on social media.

Use Case #1: Meditate 20 Minutes a Day

Suppose that you want to start meditating for twenty minutes every day. Start meditating for a minute today. Increase the duration by one minute every day. Within twenty days, you will get to your target level. Now, all you have to do is to maintain that habit. Don’t give up if you fail to follow up on your goal. Just pick up the practice where you stopped. Once you get to the twenty minutes a day, keep that habit going while starting another self-discipline goal.

Use Case #2: Minimizing Social Media Use

Imagine, you spend an hour or more on social media each day and you want to decrease that to fifteen minutes. To do that, use a method that is called timeboxing. In this method, we are going to allocate a timeslot to social media and use social media only in that timeslot. Before starting this exercise make a commitment to consume social media only within the designated timeslot. Outside of that timeslot, you will use relaxation techniques to deal with the withdrawal symptoms.

On the first day, allocate an hour of uninterrupted time to social media. The challenge is twofold here. The first challenge is not to use social media outside of that hour. The second challenge is to not exceed that hour once you start. You need to make a commitment to both of them.

“Set a timer and place it away from your where you sit. That makes you stand up and walk, which interrupts your auto-pilot mode.”

You better set a timer at the beginning of that hour and put the timer away from where you consume social media. That way you will need to stand up and walk towards that timer. This interrupts your pattern of consuming social media and increases your ability to tap into your self-discipline. At the end of that hour, stop using social media for the day.

The next day, decrease your social media consumption by three minutes. Decrease your social media consumption by three minutes each day until you restrict yourself to fifteen minutes each day. At the same time, keep the other self-discipline challenges going. Each day write down a little report in your self-discipline dairy. You better get a dairy with the dates prefilled, which makes it obvious if you skipped a day or two. Writing down your accomplishment every day will improve your motivation to push the bar 1% every day.

Use Case #3: Reducing Caffeine, Sugar, etc. Consumption

Suppose that you want to reduce your caffeine consumption.

  • Measure your caffeine intake on a given day. For example, four cups throughout the day.
  • Determine your goal. For example, one cup a day in the morning.
  • On the first day, replace the last coffee with green tea. That makes three cups of coffee and a cup of green tea.
  • On the following days two days, keep replacing the last cup of coffee with green tea.
  • Once you are down to a cup of coffee and three green teas, start dropping a green tea per day until you only drink one cup of coffee per day.

Eventually, you can use a hot beverage that is completely caffeine free to replace the coffee and/or green tea. I enjoy grain coffee on cold winter days. It has a similar taste to coffee and completely caffeine free. Similar regimes can be developed for reducing your sugar consumption and other foods.

Conclusion

“What gets measured gets improved.” Peter Drucker

You can build world-class self-discipline within a year just by making 1% improvements every day. All you have to do is the following.

  1. Make a list of self-discipline improvements.
  2. Pick up a challenge at a time.
  3. Measure where you start.
  4. Determine the goal that you want to achieve.
  5. Make a 1% improvement towards your goal until you reach it.
  6. Once you reach your goal, pick up another challenge and repeat the process.
  7. Don’t forget to maintain your self-discipline by maintaining your previous improvements.

What do you think? Is it possible for you to build world class self-discipline in a single year using the 1% improvements? Which self-discipline improvements are you going to make in the next year?

How to Reverse Engineer Your Life

In yesterday’s post, I’ve explained how to set life goals that relate to your core desires and to your reality. That post was about finding a direction in your life. Today’s post will be about creating a perspective in your life.

Ideally, you need to have both, a direction and a perspective. With a direction, you know where you’re going. With a perspective, you know how to get there. Choosing your direction and perspective consciously will boost your satisfaction and success in life. You can use the reverse engineering exercise on any goal, but it is especially effective on big, audacious life goals.

The Intuitive Way of Approaching Goals

When we set a goal, we carry out the first action step that comes the most naturally to us. This is the most intuitive thing to do when we set a goal that we are enthusiastic about. That is definitely more effective than doing nothing at all. Nevertheless, if we don’t get any significant results, we might get demotivated and give up on our goal.

The Effective Way of Approaching Goals

Reverse engineering is the complete opposite of what comes naturally to us. In this method, we don’t start from the beginning, but we start from the end and we work our way backwards. At every step, we ask ourselves the following question.

“What needs to happen in order to realize this goal?”

Once we find an answer to the question above, we ask the same question for the answer we found. We keep asking this question, until we come up with an action step that can be immediately executed. Let’s work on an example where our life goal is financial freedom.

  • What needs to happen in order to achieve financial freedom?
    • My savings should cover my expenses for the rest of my life.
  • What needs to happen in order to grow my savings to that level?
    • I need to increase my income.
    • I need to save regularly a significant amount of my income.
    • I need to build a diversified portfolio of investments.
  • What needs to happen in order to increase my income?
    • I need to get a promotion or find a better paying job.
  • What needs to happen in order to get a promotion or to find a better paying job?
    • …

If you continue the reverse engineering process above, you might come up with the following immediate action steps. As you see, we create three different goals at the second step. If you create multiple goals at any step, make sure to apply the reverse engineering process to all the goals that you create at any step, so that you can reach the immediate action steps for each of them.

  • Contact the Human Resources Department to determine the skill set needed for a promotion.
  • Save 10% of my income.
  • Spend at least half an hour every day to learn more about building a diversified portfolio.

The Effects of Reverse Engineering on Your Mind

With the reverse engineering process, you not only discover your immediate action steps, but you also see how your immediate action steps are connected to your final goal. This keeps you from getting demotivated if you don’t get any results from your immediate action steps.

“Working from the end goal backwards gives your deep mind the signal that the goal is already accomplished.”

Reverse engineering also puts you in another frame of mind. Working from the end goal backwards gives your deep mind the signal that the goal is already accomplished. That prevents your deep mind from coming up with all kinds of obstacles. If you start from the beginning and work your way forwards, your deep mind unconsciously eliminates the steps that are outside of your comfort zone. At the end, you come up with a first action step that is the most comfortable to you, but not necessarily the most effective one. With the reverse engineering technique, you don’t have any excuses but to find the most effective step that you can come up with. There’s no chance to fool yourself.

Summary / Call to Action

The intuitive way of approaching goals is to start from where you are and work your way towards your goal. When you use that approach, your mind discards actions that are outside of your comfort zone and comes up with the actions that you are familiar with.

The effective way of approaching goals is the other way around, start from the end and work your way back to where you are now. This gives your deep mind the signal that you have already achieved your goal. You let your deep mind figure out the logical steps between your goal and where you are now. This method prevents your mind from discarding the action steps that are outside of your comfort zone.

Apply the reverse engineering process on a goal and let us know how it works for you.

How to Find Your Direction in Life

There’s no doubt that having a direction in life increases your chances of success and satisfaction in life. I already shared an exercise about how to find your north star by writing your own obituary. It boils down to answering the following question.

“What kind of a life would you like to have lived at the end of your life?”

Today’s exercise is not an alternative to the obituary exercise, but it is complementary. Today, we will go deeper than the obituary exercise. We will cut through the noise of our superficial mind and find the needs and desires of our deep mind. Today’s exercise starts with brainstorming and then it goes into deep reflection mode.

“What would you create in your life, if you had infinite power?”

Ask the question above to yourself and write down your answers. Every time you come up with an answer, answer the following question.

“Then what?”

This is a great follow-up question, because it cuts through the noise of your superficial mind.

Suppose that someone gives the following answers to the questions above.

  • “I want to win the lottery.”
    • Then what?
  • “I will quit my job.”
    • Then what?
  • “I will move to a bigger home.”
    • Then what?
  • “I will travel the world.”
    • Then what?
  • …

Discover Your Deepest Desires

If you keep questioning, you will hit a point where you will discover your deepest desires. In the example above, the person might discover that their deepest desires are financial security and adventure. All the other wants were just superficial expressions of their core desires.

“Your superficial wants are just some shallow expressions of your core desires. Once you get that, you can create conscious goals that relate better to your core desires and reality.”

Once the person above becomes aware of their core desires, they can work directly on them instead of dreaming of a windfall. They could work on more realistic strategies to achieve financial security. Moreover, they can include some adventure in their life in a conscious way.

“Can you see how this way of reasoning is more satisfactory compared to dreaming about some unrealistic desires but doing nothing about them?”

I strongly recommend that you do the obituary exercise combined with the technique explained in this post. Once you have determined your core desires, come up with a few life goals that would satisfy those core desires. To keep things simple for your Goliath, don’t exceed ten life goals.

Validate Your Life Goals

If you are not 100% sure about your life goals, you can ask yourself the following questions to validate them.

  • How am I going to feel about these choices at the end of my life?
  • Will I miss anything?
  • Will I have any regrets?

The goal is to come to a point where you have 100% satisfactory answers to these questions. Once you have finished this exercise, write it on a sheet of paper and read it every day, as the first thing in the morning to calibrate your mind towards the accomplishment of your deepest desires.

What’s Next?

Today’s exercise, combined with the obituary exercise was about finding your direction your life. In tomorrow’s exercise, we are going to work on how to make progress towards the accomplishment of your life goals.