Tag Archives: Emotional Intelligence

Love the Pain

Our ancestors evolved in an era when food and other resources were rare, and challenges and threats were abundant. Needless to say, there wasn’t any entertainment, alcohol, tobacco, caffeine, and other recreational drugs. As a result, we’re born with a psyche that is addicted to pleasure and avoids pain as much as possible. That made […]

An Effective Method to Eliminate Bad Habits

  Let me share with you three facts, and then explain how we can use them to eliminate bad habits. Our minds work with associations. Emotions have a higher impact on our behavior than thoughts. Negative emotions have a higher impact than positive emotions. An Example: Quitting Smoking I used to be a smoker. It […]

What I Learned from an Airplane Flight That Took Six Hours Longer Than Planned

Last Saturday, I returned back from vacation. What started with a 40-minute delay ended up in a perfect storm, literally. My three-hour flight ended up as a nine-hour journey between three airports, which was a great lesson to practice what I preach in my blog posts. Lately, I’m writing more and more about personality traits. […]

An Unexpected Shortcut to Mental Toughness

What would satisfy you the most? Buy the luxury sports car that you want? Move to the five-bedroom home of your dreams? Start a relationship with the partner that you yearn for? Maybe, your desires are subtler. Being respected by others. Being admired by them. Being approved. Turning heads around when you’re in public. Or […]

Why You’re Running in Circles and How to Break Free

Imagine you’re on a ship with a bunch of people. Once in a while, one of those people get to the wheel. They change the direction of the ship to their liking. They use all the resources of the ship to sail in the direction they want. Once they’re satisfied, they sit down. After a […]

Integrating Seemingly Opposite Personality Traits for High Performance and Success

Last Saturday, I published a post about “being” goals. These are the personality traits that you cultivate to achieve your “doing” and “having” goals. In the same post, I shared the big five personality traits, the 13 virtues of Benjamin Franklin, and a list of 600+ primary personality traits. Those lists should help you come […]

Effortless Success

One of the 12 life-changing books I shared last week is The Surrender Experiment by Michael A. Singer. Michael A. Singer was a college student who started practicing mindfulness and yoga to deal with the chatter in his mind and ended up as the founder and CEO of a billion-dollar software company. It’s a fantastic, […]

The Critical Principle You’re Violating

There’s a simple principle that gets violated often nowadays. This principle is a critical one in our personal and professional lives. It’s one of the 7 Habits of Highly Effective People. I’d call it empathy, but I’ll use Stephen R. Covey’s definition. Seek first to understand, then to be understood. Covey divides the 7 habits […]

Identifying and Changing Thought and Behavior Patterns

In my recent posts, my focus was on using emotional intelligence for personal success. Most of the personal development ideas and practices don’t work, because they are based on intellectual concepts. Our behavior isn’t motivated by thoughts. It’s driven by our emotions. We fail miserably when we try to regulate our behavior with our thoughts. […]

Emotional Intelligence for High Performance

Yesterday’s post was about using emotional intelligence (EQ) to overcome dysfunctional patterns. Today, we’ll learn how to use EQ to maximize our performance. In yesterday’s post, I introduced the 2×2 model of EQ. That model involves the awareness and regulation of emotions of yourself and others. We’re interested in becoming aware and regulating our own […]

Burak Bilgin

Software developer with a Ph.D. and 15 years of experience. I write daily on personal development and life lessons. Sign up to my email newsletter to receive a weekly overview of my latest content on personal development and life lessons.